Am I Funny?

Who am I? Who, who, who, who?

I’m old, fat, bald, semi-retired, and self-unemployed.

So I’ve got all that going for me.

But, am I FUNNY?

That has never been proved.

Not scientifically.

I did attend Clown College. 

But of course plenty of people attend college and learn nothing.

I did win humor awards.

When my young nephews saw my many trophies, they were mightily impressed. Until they learned all were awarded for me talking.

I did read “Not Even A Store” on Vermont’s Funniest Stories on VPR’s (Vermont Public Radio).

This while my wife and I lived in Shoreham, Vermont’s largest dairy farm town in Vermont’s largest dairy farm county – which means there were many more cows than people. Yet a rebroadcast of that episode happened while my only “next door” (across the “street,” a cratered dirt road) neighbor was driving past my house, causing him to yell, “Is that Roger I’m listening to on the radio?”

I did perform standup comedy in the San Francisco area for 8 years.

At first, I suffered for my art. But not as much as my audiences did. But eventually, I was fortunate enough to win “The First Annual FOG Comedy Competition” (the comic who organized that competition asked me if I knew what “FOG” stood for; I said I assumed it was a reference to the fog that saturated the city; he said, “No, it stands for “Fat Oriental Guy;” which I guess was OK since that was him), and winning opened up opportunities.

I did earn money.

I admit, my routine was mediocre, but my MC (Master of Ceremonies) skills were superior, making me a sought-after MC by more established comics. But that was not based solely on my humor, but rather in recognition of my skill running shows.

I won humorous speech competitions.

I joined a San Francisco area Toastmasters club (my then girlfriend and future wife – 2 separate women – were members), and after a couple of weeks represented them in Toastmasters’ Humorous Speech Contest. I came in second. Twenty years later, living in Shoreham, I joined another Toastmasters Club and again competed in the Comedy Competition. 

I came in second.

Inspiring me to say, “In 20 years, I’ve made no progress.”

But my so-called joke only lasted one year. Because the next year, I was the champion. The speech that won me first place was: It’s A Bird! It’s A Plane! It’s Super Rog!

So, AM I funny? Am I qualified to judge? Am I impartial? 

Absolutely not.

Only YOU can reach that verdict.

YOU tell ME:

Who am I? Who, who, who, who?

Cause I really wanna know 

Welcome to the party! I look forward to your feedback and to the next email with another essay and report on my progress writing Becoming Super Rog!